Monday, May 19, 2008

Lazy, Bland and Uninvolving (and that's just the review)

Last year I said that The Lazarus Experiment was an album track* because it was harmless but forgettable: the kind of thing which you can have on without paying too much attention to it. It was filler, pure and simple, like one of those one and half minute songs I used to put at the end of romantic mix tapes to use up all the space.

The Unicorn and the Wasp is also an album track, but this time one that you would never, ever put on a compilation tape to give to your girlfriend, no matter how short of material you were. Even if all you had was Tina Turner's Private Dancer and this episode of New Who, you'd just make a straight tape to tape copy of the Tina album and wing it.

[ok, I stretched that not brilliant analogy to the point of breaking and beyond, but really, I have a headache and can't be bothered doing a review of this bland paste of a script. I am officially grumpy.]

Instead I'll nick bits of other people's reactions and comments online, and make a mini-review that way.

The Unicorn and the Wasp - A Review by Myriad People

Ooh, I've wasted my life.[1]

I did find last night's episode ultimately unsatisfying[2] but I suppose what annoyed me was saying how wonderful Christie was when I prefer Allingham and Sayers from that era[3]. I was a little bit bored with The Wasp and the Unicorn - in very much the way I am when I read Agatha Christie novels[4].

It was rubbish as a murder mystery[5]. There's a list of things that have to be there, and making them fit is not exactly elegant.[6] It should have ditched any attempt at emotion[7] - this was the straw that broke the poor little camel's back.[8]

Rusty is gay.[9] That's the only moment I can see myself remembering with any specific fondness. [10]

Typing hurts. Shouldn't have had[11] vats of caviar.[12]

I've just imagined a Black Orchid style story in which the tenth Doctor meets the older Campion and they solve murders together.[13]

And some links to far better reviews than this nonsense: Simon, Ian, Rob, Marie, Daniel, Lawrence, Louise, and Jane.

* Actually Scott said it and I nicked it - it's about time he said something useful
With thanks to:
[1] Daniel O'Mahony
[2] Jonn Elledge
[3] David Ball
[4] Kelly Hale
[5] Paul Ian Harman
[6] Allan Bednar
[7] Jonn Elledge
[8] Ian Mond
[9] Mike Montfort
[10] Jonn Elledge
[11] SK
[12] Paul Ebbs
[13] Mags Halliday
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Blogger SAF said...

Lol. Not about you feeling grumpy, but half-inching other people's comments and stringing them together. That's, what, chain-plagiarising? But as one who was also all for saving his breath on that episode, I salute you :)

9:57 pm  

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